The Anti-Zen Guide to Improving Your Impulse Control
Mindfulness is often praised, and rightly so. However, it’s crucial to remember that mindfulness is a developed skill. If you’re new to it, or haven’t practiced enough, simply being present in the moment might not be enough to stop you from overeating.
Food cravings are powerful, driven by biology and psychology. While intuitive and mindful eating are valuable, they often work best for individuals who already possess strong impulse control.
Many people struggle with dietary restraint. Those who seem to have willpower often rely on established habits, not just sheer willpower.
Intuitive eating improves with practice. It’s a skill refined over time.
If you find it hard to make healthy food choices, feel regret or shame about overeating, or struggle to see fitness results despite eating “pretty healthy,” then intuitive eating might be a more advanced technique for you in the future.
For now, you need practical strategies—skills to remove yourself from situations that trigger your unhealthy eating habits. These are your immediate “life rafts.”
Understanding Food Cravings
Cravings are a normal human experience. They’re not a sign of weakness or failure. Thinking of cravings as only extreme, pathological urges is inaccurate and unhelpful. This misconception prevents many people from using effective strategies to manage their everyday cravings.
A food craving isn’t always about intensely desiring chocolate all day. Consider this common scenario: You’re at a restaurant, intending to order a healthy meal. But when the server comes to you, you impulsively order something less healthy. That’s a craving in action.
A craving is simply a strong desire for a specific food. While hunger can contribute to cravings, they are not the same thing.
Think about it: Have you ever craved broccoli intensely? Eaten a whole bag of celery without realizing it? Made a special trip to the store for Brussels sprouts because you couldn’t stop thinking about them?
Probably not. And if you did, you likely didn’t feel ashamed about it.
A craving is a biological urge for calorie-dense, highly rewarding foods. The specific taste can vary, but low-calorie vegetables are usually not on the list. This is because our bodies are naturally programmed to crave high-calorie foods. Our primal “caveman brain” is wired for survival, leading us to crave cheese, sugar, carbohydrates, fatty meats, and fried foods.
Our sense of smell, food memories, and ingrained habits all contribute to cravings for rewarding foods and our tendency to indulge them.
Why is this a problem in modern life?
Enjoying food is good, and occasional indulgence is fine. However…
Our preference for rich foods was essential for survival when food was scarce. Feasting when food was available, like gorging on nuts, fruits, or a large animal, ensured our ancestors’ survival. But today, we have an abundance of food. Many of us struggle to control the impulses that once helped us survive. Every day can feel like a feast day, and our primal brain can take over, even though rich foods are readily available all the time.
But there’s more to it than just biology.
The Emotional Connection to Food
Beyond our biological wiring to seek out calorie-rich foods, there’s a deeper, often unconscious, layer: our mental and emotional relationships with food.
It’s not just the sugar, starch, and salt that give us a momentary lift. It’s also the associations we build with certain foods.
Perhaps you use food to relax. Maybe it represents social time with friends. Maybe enjoying tasty food is one of the few regular pleasures you allow yourself. Or maybe it’s a form of rebellion, a way of saying, “I can do what I want.”
The problem arises when we don’t actually want these outcomes in the long run. If we can’t learn to manage our natural cravings and the emotional attachments we have to food rituals, we lose control of our ability to build a sustainable healthy lifestyle. We become passengers, not drivers, in our food choices.
The typical consequences include weight gain (or difficulty losing or maintaining weight), and the development of health issues over time.
Even more significantly, struggling with cravings and feeling a lack of control can erode your self-esteem, freedom, and self-respect. The constant feeling of “Why did I do that again?” can lead to self-criticism and a loss of confidence—even if you’re not overweight.
The mental aspect of health and fitness is as crucial as the physical results. Trusting yourself, feeling confident in your decisions, and living freely are essential for long-term well-being as a whole person.
Step Away from the Present Moment
When cravings strike, the most effective strategy is to shift your focus away from the present moment.
Why?
Firstly, cravings are rooted in the present. Directly battling them in the moment is often difficult.
Secondly, breaking the craving cycle requires building new habits. Repeatedly placing yourself in triggering situations only reinforces old, unhealthy habits.
You need to disrupt the craving loop.
Practical Strategies to Beat Cravings
Practical strategies are highly effective in preventing most craving battles before they even begin.
Prevention is your strongest tool. As mentioned, the key is to break the cycle by changing the situation or distracting yourself so the craving passes. Avoiding the triggering situation altogether is even better.
Mindfulness can be helpful later, but for now, focus on taking action.
Here are some actionable examples to beat food cravings near you:
- Alter your commute: Change your route to work or daily walks to avoid passing by your usual “comfort food” spots. Finding new routes “near me” can eliminate visual cues that trigger cravings.
- Optimize your kitchen environment: Keep your kitchen tidy and make only fruits and vegetables visible. Store away all other foods, even perceived “healthy” snacks like nuts and cereals. This reduces immediate access to tempting foods “near me” in your home.
- Eliminate junk food: Get rid of any overtly unhealthy foods lingering in your cabinets, refrigerator, or freezer. This removes readily available temptations “near me”.
- Change your dining habits: If you frequently overeat at certain restaurants “near me”, stop going to them. Explore new dining options that support your health goals.
- Maintain regular meal times: Ensure you are eating every 3-4 hours to prevent actual hunger from fueling cravings. Consistent eating patterns “near me” (at home or work) can stabilize your appetite.
- Prioritize protein and fiber: Incorporate enough protein and fiber in your diet. These nutrients promote satiety and reduce cravings. Find local grocery stores “near me” that offer fresh, high-fiber and protein-rich foods.
- Stay hydrated: Drink enough water throughout the day. Sometimes thirst can be mistaken for hunger or cravings. Keep water readily available “near me” wherever you are.
- Replace snack routines: Instead of typical snack times, create alternative routines like a walk, a gym visit, or running errands. Find local gyms or walking trails “near me” to shift your focus away from food during snack times.
- Manage workplace triggers: If a coworker keeps candy out, avoid that desk or office area. Find alternative routes around your workplace that minimize exposure to food temptations “near me”.
- Know your personal weaknesses: If you tend to crave food during afternoon slumps or while watching TV at night, proactively replace those routines. Go for an afternoon walk “near me” or attend a local evening fitness class before relaxing with TV. Any routine change can disrupt the craving pattern.
It’s important to distinguish between cravings and actual hunger. You should always eat when you are truly hungry, especially if it’s been 3-4 hours since your last meal. Remember, hunger can intensify cravings, but cravings are specifically desires for calorie-rich foods. When genuinely hungry, most foods will seem appealing!
Mental Strategies for Cravings
Mental strategies are more useful in situations you can’t avoid, such as social events, parties, or dinners with friends. You’re in the moment, surrounded by tempting food.
Imagine you’re at a restaurant, choosing from the menu. The server approaches to take your order. You know you should choose salmon and vegetables, but fried mozzarella balls and creamy pasta sound much more appealing.
This is where present-moment mindfulness can fail.
If you pause and ask, “Do I really want this right now?”
…The internal answer might be a resounding “YES!”
Your biology and ingrained habits are screaming:
“SKIP THE VEGGIES, GET THE FRIED MOZZARELLA BALLS!!! AND BRING ON DESSERT!!!”
In these moments, listening to your immediate desires can be counterproductive. You’re not listening to your best self, but to your primal “caveman brain” which prioritizes immediate gratification and energy storage. If you’re still developing mindful food decision skills, it’s easy to abandon your healthy intentions and justify indulging with “I’m at a wedding / dinner with friends / on a date… time for a treat!”
Instead, in these situations, as the server approaches, ask yourself these three questions to broaden your perspective and shift away from the present craving:
“Have I made this choice before, and how did I feel afterwards?”
Recalling past experiences is helpful. For example, after ordering seafood soup twice at a certain restaurant and feeling unwell afterward, I learned to avoid it permanently. It took experiencing the negative consequence twice to create a lasting aversion.
“How will future-me feel in about two hours?”
Project yourself into the near future. Do you want to leave feeling good about your choices, or regretful and wishing you had made healthier decisions?
“Am I truly going to miss out?”
This is crucial. Sometimes, the answer is yes.
Occasionally.
For example, when in Italy, I relax my usual no-pastry rule. The pastries are exceptional, and I feel like I would genuinely miss out on a unique cultural experience. The cuisine is integral to the travel experience.
However, if you attend weddings frequently throughout the year, that specific wedding buffet isn’t a truly unique culinary experience. Choosing fish and vegetables instead of pasta might not mean missing out on anything truly special, as you’re there for the celebration, not primarily for the food.
Most of the time, you are not missing out on anything significant.
Building Self-Trust
Over time, consistently practicing dietary restraint strengthens your self-control “muscle.” Eventually, you’ll develop the ability to trust your intuitive eating choices. Your primal brain will always be there, but your healthy habits will become so ingrained that the “GET THE MOZZARELLA BALLS…” impulse will be a quiet whisper, easily overridden by your established routines.
Developing strong, self-regulating habits takes time, patience, consistency, and self-discipline.
Remember to appreciate your “caveman brain.” It played a vital role in your survival.
But in today’s world of food abundance, you no longer need to be ruled by it. You can lovingly guide it towards healthier choices.
