You know, this review isn’t based on the idea that Foodfight the movie is just a slightly flawed film. It’s truly, undeniably awful. However, the story surrounding this terrible piece of animation is almost more interesting than the film itself. This supposed “movie” finally appeared in December 2012, a full decade after its intended release in December 2002. The original version was reportedly stolen, which in hindsight, might have been a blessing. Yet, fueled by either hope or the dread of losing a staggering $45 million, the creators decided to start over. The result? Quite possibly one of the worst cinematic experiences ever conceived.
If Foodfight the movie were just another forgettable Hollywood failure, it might be easier to dismiss. But considering just how spectacularly bad it is on every level, you’d expect it to be the work of a teenager with some VFX software, not a $45 million animated feature starring names like Charlie Sheen and Dwayne Brady. When you consider that indie classics like Clerks were made for $25,000 and Napoleon Dynamite for $40,000, it’s baffling how Foodfight the movie‘s budget ballooned past even a fraction of $45 million. One might joke that Charlie Sheen used $44 million of it on illicit substances, and honestly, looking at the finished product, it wouldn’t be entirely surprising. It truly feels like everyone involved was under some kind of influence throughout the entire production of Foodfight the movie.
Words truly fail to capture the sheer depth of awfulness that Foodfight the movie achieves. It is comprehensively terrible in every conceivable way. And this isn’t hyperbole. The animation is visually painful, like watching nails scratch across your eyeballs. The sound effects are cheap and jarring, the plot is nonsensical and rambling, and the characters are so utterly bland they barely register as present. And the misery just drags on, and on, and on, and on, repeating ad nauseam. Foodfight the movie isn’t just bad; it reaches levels of awfulness that become almost comical. In fact, it transcends mere badness and becomes genuinely, laughably bad. Watching it is an experience that will leave you in tears – tears of relief when it finally ends, tears of regret for wasting your precious time, and tears of laughter that something this monumentally awful actually exists.
Seriously, watch Foodfight the movie at least once. You will absolutely quote this review afterwards.
